I’ve struggled with writing this article a lot. Mainly because, well, you should answer this question in the title with a clear ‘yes’, correct? So does questioning it make me ungrateful or bitter? I am in the fortunate position that I am able to donate some of my income to things I am passionate about and that are important to me. But every now and then I think about it – and I am not sure if it really makes me happier.

Studies show that donating makes us feel good

There have been quite a few studies that are looking into how it makes us feel to give to others. And, well, the consensus is that it indeed does. But it depends on three circumstances and after reading a bit into it, they do make sense to me.

1. Giving feels nice

That’s the first one – and I agree with it completely. Giving to others, the physical act, this is what makes me happy. Be that gifting friends or families, making someone a compliment (which, to me, is just giving in a different way), doing something nice for a person you don’t know – be it something spontaneous or planned, such as volunteering somewhere. These are the types that, yes, give my gratification and make me feel better about myself.

But here’s the thing: I do not get this reward of endorphins while donating money. There are a handful of charities and organisations and support, and each month, when the money is taken out of the account, I just acknowledge it. But they don’t necessarily make me feel better. Should they? It’s something that is, on the paper, such a good thing to do – but just having things taken out of your bank account just really don’t make a difference, even if I try.

2. It depends on if you had a choice

Autonomy about what you are doing or donating is, I agree again entirely, such a massive factor. I won’t lie, I am not good at turning down people that come to my door – and I know I am not alone with this, which I know is kind of what they are playing at, don’t they? I don’t want to remove their credibility, I know that the charities and organisations they work for make good use of the money they receive – but it always leaves such a bad taste in my mouth. I know I am doing good, but it always feels forced. And whenever I ended up being in a situation like this, I cancelled the donations every single time. The ones I chose myself, however? They are staying. They don’t feel like a burden. They feel like, well, I voluntarily donate.

The UK has an incredibly large donation culture in comparison to to Germany – I can’t remember ever having someone go from door to door, outside of supermarkets or seeing the overwhelming amount of adverts on television. I know it’s important for people to hear your name, but as I said, this always feels forced more than anything.

3. Being able to see results

This is, maybe, why simply donating feels so disconnected – because you can’t see cause and effect in action. But knowing the difference that you made helps – and the smaller and localised, the more it affects. Donating toward a global charity is amazing, but it’s just too far away. Whereas a local non-profit might have immediate impact. It’s such a difficult thing, when it really should just be something lovely.

I guess for me, the question really can’t be answered that easily. I am indeed happy when I can help on a very small scale – whereas the bigger scale, which can have way more impact, often leaves me untouched. Reading further through the studies, I guess that touches on the question if humans really can be altruistic – selfless. If we’re chasing the gratification from small scale donations, is that selfish? So is being disconnected altruistic? At the end of the day – does it matter? It’s a win for whatever you decide to donate to; nature, in my case. And I guess even if I don’t feel happy when I see the notification of my bank statement – I am happy when I walk through our British forests, which I know I help maintain. Even in a disconnected way.

[Picture by Sandy Millar – thank you!]