Alright. So we established that Germans use quite a lot of English words in everyday life – so-called anglicisms. Usually, it’s for things we didn’t have that got just kind of adapted. A lot of especially technical terms fall under this category. Or, well, things like small talk – simply because us Germans don’t really do that. Either way, a bunch of good English words have made its way into our language, the same way that a lot of German words have made it into yours!

But beneath this sanity lie hidden shenanigans. Words or expressions, that appear to be of English origin, but really aren’t. Some might simply not exist, most of them turn out to have an entirely different meaning to how it’s used in the other language. I didn’t realise how many they are – and how funny some of them turned out to be. So without further ado, here are my top 10 pseudo-anglicisms for you.

• 1. Beamer – So apparently, you use this word as – uh – a name for a BMW? Or something done in cricket? Well, in Germany, this is a video projector.
• 2. Bodybag – a bit of a macabre one! Because, uh, this isn’t a bag for bodies. Instead, it’s our term for a messenger bag. This one just asks for a misunderstanding, doesn’t it?
• 3. Pony – Okay, okay, hear me out. I actually don’t know why we use the term for this, but in German, this is what we call a fringe or bangs. Maybe it’s because we call a ponytail a “horsetail” in German. Pony’s are smaller, so they are getting the other side of the head?
• 4. Smoking – This one, to be fair, has confused me quite a bit. Because there is a perfectly fine English term for this, so why would we come up with a different one that isn’t? Either way, it’s not about the act of smoking, no, this is our term for a tuxedo. Yep. Talk about random.
• 5. Mailbox – You’d really think that this one would be straight forward, wouldn’t you. It really isn’t. I told you, we use lots of English terms for technical stuff; this one isn’t for your mail outside your house – no, this one is your voice mail.
• 6. Mobbing – I believe this one doesn’t even exist in English! A proper fluke! Well, this term is the German equivalent of the English bullying. Well, I guess you can use the verb accordingly, but as a noun, this one’s definitely unique.
• 7. Partnerlook – Time for a cute one! If you’re going for a partner look, you and someone else are wearing the same outfit, doesn’t matter if on purpose or by accident.
• 8. Shooting – Our term for a photo shooting. No guns involved. Only cameras.
• 9. Oldtimer – This is quite a cute one. It’s what you’d call an older person, correct? Queue my confusion once I learned that. Because, well, we use this term for vintage or antique cars.
• 10. Handy – This is a mobile phone, friends. A mobile phone. And it does make sense, doesn’t it? After all, it is quite a handy little thing. My partner was quite amused when I used the term before he explained to me what the urban dictionary had to say about this.

[Picture by Andrea De Santis – thank you!]